MOMENTS

There are many moments in our lives that only death can erase them from our memories. Somehow, we aimlessly recall a few of these moments on a regular day. Compiling a list of moments that we may recall in a month or two is a huge feat. For some reasons when we reach certain age, I mean at an age of a half-century or older, we start recalling moments happened to us long time ago, but we could not remember what we ate for dinner the night before.  This is almost universal among all people regardless of race or gender, but the degree of this kind of amnesia varies from one person to another.  Occasionally we encounter cases where the people are quite oblivious of their surroundings to the point we could hear them talking to themselves.  I might add when young people are talking loudly to themselves, it is most likely they are talking to their cell phones embedded into their ears. Technology nowadays plays tricks on us and we should not be duped of diagnosing absent-minded cases even though we may be technologically impaired.  The moments we recall from our childhood and teenager years represent sad and happy events, but some of them reflect good sense of humor. Sometimes I found myself laughing out loud by myself on funny moments happened years ago.  Usually these bursts of hilarious laughter happened when nobody is around, but when that happened in the presence of my wife, she would look at me as if I am one of those lower life forms.  The unforgettable moments that keep bouncing in my head this week are listed here and randomly placed without a particular order albeit narrating them is part of the order we encounter in chaos.

  • The moment of the first class I attended in the first grade was kind of funny.  The teacher tried to teach us the Arabic vowel by exaggerating the movement of his mouth.  He puckered his lips so much when he demonstrated the “O” to us.  Every time I see a man with a big mouth, the image of that teacher is triggered in my mind.
  • My elementary school years were very harsh especially when we had teachers who punished us for not knowing the things that they did not teach them to us in the classrooms.  This was really the norm we encountered with many teachers who blamed us for being stupid pupils.  If we have videos of these classes and show them to the nowadays grade students, they would be astonished about how badly we were treated.  On a religious class of my third grade, somehow the teacher closed his eyes turned around a few times and pointed at me.  He asked me to show the class how to pray. The praying rituals are not that difficult since I watched my mother praying at least three times a day.  Nobody taught us what to say in these prayers at that age.  I stood in front of the class facing Mecca and for some unknown reasons I cannot recall anything to say.  It was my first time ever to feel I really had speech impediment.  Everything turned blank in my mind.  I could not even hear the teacher yelling and screaming at me.  At that moment I was shaken out of my body experience when I was hit on the back of my hands with a large stick.  My knuckles were bruised and stayed black for several days.  The image of that teacher still engraved in my mind and it reminded me with the devil image as we human know it.
  • The junior high school I attended was located in my home town (Bani Naim), which was sparsely populated at that time. After passing the 9th grade examinations, we were directed to attend a high school in the city of Hebron. The excitement and anticipation were sky high.  It was more or less like the passage from childhood to manhood.  It was a significant milestone in our lives.  I thought at that time the parents will provide some money to their children to pay for the bus tariff and buy lunches.  Having a falafel sandwich from a street vendor in Hebron was a divine treat.  On the first day of school I woke up so early to get ready and wear my best clothes.  I combed my hair several times to make sure I can attract the attention of the female students, who took the daily trip on the same bus.  I went to my mother and asked her for lunch money.  She sensed my excitement, but could not find enough money to give me.  So, she looked at me with her sad eyes and tried to pass a bundle of two large tomatoes and a piece of home-made bread.  At that moment I looked at her with a lump in my throat.  I did not know whether to cry or to laugh.  The thought of carrying a bundle of two tomatoes and a piece of bread on the bus in front of all girls is humiliating to my manhood.  I told my mother I saved some money and I will buy my lunch.  That was a lie since I did not have a single penny on me. That day I walked in the streets of Hebron pretending in front of my peers that I was shopping for the best falafel sandwich.  I went hungry that day, but the moment of seeing my mother’s face that morning is still with me up to this day.  Occasionally, I bundle two tomatoes and a piece of bread and take them for my lunch.  I was not ashamed of the bundle anymore.  People at work would pass by my office and asked “what do you have for lunch today?” I tell them, two tomatoes and a piece of bread.  Their most common reply is “This must be a very healthy lunch.” Several of my peers around here start bringing tomatoes and bread for their own lunch.   Whenever I see tomatoes and bread together, I recall my mother, look up toward heaven, and say “thank you,” but I also wish for a home-made piece of bread.
  • There are many moments were prevented from happening to us in one way or another.  The moment when a detainee is set free and looks back at the gate of his prison is an instant in which a sequence of events flashes momentarily in his mind squeezing the years and months into a second or two.  This moment may represent regret, sorrow, pleasure, and insanity all at once.  Even this moment was denied for me when I was lead blind folded toward my exile.  I am still wondering what I may have felt or thought of during this particular moment when exiting the gate of the penitentiary erected on top of a hill in the middle of Hebron.  Theoretically speaking, I can make up and create that moment, but the reality prevents me from doing so.
  • I was watching the recent revolution in Egypt and during the night when the president was removed from power, the shouting in the Liberation square was so loud I could even hear it half way around the world.  I was glued to the TV watching that moment, which was stretched for most of the night.  One of the TV cameras was focused on the rising sun that morning.  To me, it was like I was physically present watching the rising new sun of Egypt.  The commentator said “And this is the new sun of Egypt.”  At that moment I realized, there will be a new sun to Palestine; sooner or later.
  • Recently I was bewildered when I saw on TV a child being mutilated by Syrian soldiers. At that moment, I had a strip of historical images that happened in the Middle East.  At the turn of last century, the Middle East and North Africa were torn apart by England, France, and Italy.  It took about forty years or so to get rid of the foreign and colonial occupation, but the liberation was very easy.  Now, the suppressed people in the Middle East are fighting a new liberation from their own governments.  As one can see it is not that easy to get rid of tyrants and dictators.  It is amazing to me to see the Arabs are asking their former occupiers to help liberating them from their own governments.  The images of the Syrian soldiers fleeing the Golan height in June 1967 and from Lebanon in August 1982 are still engraved in my mind. These soldiers are turning into lions against the children of Syria.  The image of the child kicked around to his death by several Syrian soldiers will remain in my permanent memory.

These are some of the permanent moments that came into my mind this week. It is quite difficult to describe some other moments in words.  Perhaps one can write down a list of the moments of brutal and sad events on a heavy stone and drop it in the middle of an ocean.  On the other hand, the cheerful moments may be written on a piece of paper, tie it to a large helium filled balloon and let go upward toward heaven.  Perhaps then I may forget these moments so I may move on to live another day.

Omar Manasreh
01 September 2011